It’s Amazing Grace

These past seven days have been a busy time for me. My track athletes had three meets in a period of 7 days. Also, we had pictures on Friday. Even though things seem chaotic right now, I have a sense of perspective that all my efforts with these student-athletes are not in vain. Everyday they are learning and growing, and I find myself learning many things from them. In some way they teach me how to be more calm around people, and how to relate to them. I use to be scared of having to coach and teach high school students. My fear is not so bad now.

This past Saturday we had a big meet at our school hosted by Norco High School. We got to run in the meet for free because we let them use our track for their invitational. My girl sprinters won many sprint relays that day and received metals. My boy sprinters ran the fastest times overall 30 schools in several relays in which they competed. They were excited to receive metals that day. Many of them are going to have their metals put on their letterman’s jacket. During the beginning of the season I always fear that I’m not a good enough coach. I often worry about giving them the right training they need to succeed in track and get a college scholarship. So when I seem they improve it always gives me relief–that maybe I am doing something right here. All in all, I know and desire to give God control and let him work things out in my life as he sees fit.

There are two athletes on my track team that have been on my mind lately, Brian Phan and Jonathan Gehoski. They’re both sophmores at Eleanor Roosevelt High School. A couple of weeks ago I was holding a 1 mile time trial. In the middle of the race Jonathan stopped and said he couldn’t go any further. I told him to finish it even if he had to walk it. After practice he asked me why I didn’t yell at him. I said, “because you’re already hurting yourself more than I could ever do.” We sat down in the weight room and I asked him what’s wrong. At that point, I could tell that he could no longer hold back his tears. And with the football team all around us he began to cry. He told me about his struggle at home with his mom and step dad. He said ever since his mom lost her job she’s been bickering and scolding him to the point of loosing all of his self worth. All I felt I could do at that point was acknowledge his feelings…to let him know that his feelings are real. You see, he told me that his mom makes him feel guilty for expressing his emotions. I told Scott later on…and this past week after meeting his parents, Scott said, “hey Grace, I saw first hand what he must go through at home.”

Brian Phan is more outspoken than Jonathan. But drastically shorter in height. He is a little fire ball! After practice one day Brian said at the top of his voice, “I’m going to tell my coach I love her everyday!” At that time, my thought was…hmm…he’s getting a little too attached to me. He always looks for a hug from me…trust me when I say I can’t get out of it…and neither would I want to now knowing what I know. You see, Brian also has problems at home. And I’m not saying he is totally innocent in all this. But I do believe that he is hurting and his parents just don’t know how to help him. He once told me he got into a physical confrontation with his parents and they tried calling the police on him. He dad is rarely at home due to his work load. And this is what I don’t get…he gets good grades and is a part of the Associated Student Body for our high school. Now, I’m always busy coaching boy’s and girl’s sprints, middle and long distance. But one day Brian came up to me with this sad look on his face and said, “coach you never come to watch me do pole vault.” He told me how much he has improved and how he can clear opening height now. I told him that the next day I would be there…and I was. I stopped what I was doing with the runners and encourage all around to cheer as it was his turn to vault. He didn’t clear opening height that time because of having exhausted himself with too many previous attempts. But I think it still made his day. And now I have him working out with the sprinters sometime and participating on one of the Junior varsity relay teams.

I want them to know that I do care and am there for them. I wish someone would have been there for me without manipulating me and expecting something in return. It is important to me that they feel worthful and worthwhile. My spirit aches to see them in emotional pain and grief.

Last week I decided to give Curtis a gift by helping him clean the entire apartment. You should have seen the excitement on his face and the relief when everything was in its place.

My athletes had their first track meet this past Tuesday. My boy’s took 1st, while the girl’s took 2nd. They had a blast and many of them were ecstatic to find their names and times in the Press Enterprise Newspaper.

I finally started my Guitar and piano classes again which are a part of the Riverside Community College music program. I’m excited to be back at the Fender Museum for my Guitar class with the same teacher. My teacher said he knows Matt Brown. He told me to ask him if he lived on two streets in Riverside in the past. Since I’m taking the 2nd level I’m considered advanced. You should have seen my face when my Guitar teacher, Mr. Scarano, introduced us to the beginners as the four of us were walking in and they were just about to leave. He said, “And now here comes these advanced folks who are going to show you how it’s done!” I looked at two of the others in my group with a dumb founded look on my face. I was thinking to myself…he can’t be talking about us…or at least not me! We grinned and snickered together, knowing we had a lot longer way to go as far as learning everything there is to know about guitar. Well, I’m enjoying myself and am amazed at how quickly I’m learning new material.